A Few Thoughts on Reality & Karma (posted 6/20/22)

In a recent column, I mentioned the need to accept reality on reality’s terms. Our society is getting worse and worse at this, to its detriment.

One example can be seen in a story about a plus-size model named Remi Bader.  She recently went to a horse ranch, but was not allowed to ride because of her weight, which she describes as being “more than 240” pounds.

My first thought was to sympathize with her.  I know that people can be very cruel, and that fat-shaming is a real and hurtful thing.  I felt bad for her.

But then she went on TikTok, and named and shamed the ranch, as if they could have no legitimate reason for not letting her ride one of their horses.  She claimed that the ranch “made me leave because I weigh over 240,” and that “it was very embarrassing.” 

Again, I felt bad for her, and the story’s details suggest that at least one ranch employee made some cruel comments.   Many commenters on the story supported her and criticized the ranch, whose business is apparently taking a big hit.

But her reaction seems narcissistic and self-defeating in a way that is become more and more common in our society.  Again: reality on reality’s terms.  The reality is that obesity is really bad for your health. 

People who deny that are lying to you, and even if their hearts are in the right place – if they want to spare your feelings, or feel more virtuous by championing your cause – you should reject them.    

And yes, when you add the poor horse to this story, it becomes darkly comic.  You can picture in your mind’s eye a horse with a look of horror on his face, backing away as this selfish woman tries to corner him.  And you know what the horse is thinking, don’t you?

“Nay!”

Because I’m from the 19^th century, I’m a big supporter of so-called “tough love.”  (I would just call it “love.”  As in, “I love you enough to tell you the truth.  And the truth is that you need to lose some weight.  For your own sake, and so that you don’t squash that horse!”)

The “fat pride” movement is the opposite of tough love.  Perhaps out of a misguided idea that they are helping people who have been bullied because of their weight, they become bullies themselves.  They denigrate those who are not attracted to fat people as bigots.

You can see this in a recent story about an American academic named Caitlyn “Cat” Pause.  (Cat Pause would be a funny name, but there is apparently an accent over the final “e” that ruins it.)  A leftist and feminist, she has held a university position in New Zealand for the last 15 years, focusing on fat activism.

Photos of her suggest that she is extremely overweight, and her Twitter bio includes self-descriptors including, “Fatlicious.  Feminist. Glorifying obesity since ’09.”   She has spent her career arguing against “fat stigma,” and spreading “body positivity” about being morbidly obese.

On March 24^th, she died in her sleep.  She was 42.

Announcing the news, one of her colleagues said that people she knew will be “shocked and saddened.”  “Saddened” makes sense.  But “shocked?”

Only if they’ve been holding reality at arm’s length, with their eyes tightly closed. 

Speaking of fighting a losing battle with reality, how about that Joe Biden? 

Just this month he’s insisted that the economy is doing great, yelled at some union guys that he didn’t want to hear any more lies about his reckless spending, and said that journalists have treated him badly because “they need to get clicks” on the nightly news.  

Um.  Does anybody understand that?  Or even overstand it?

His plucky spokesperson KJP – she’s a non-white immigrant who is attracted to other women, so shut up —  fielded a question about Biden’s mental acuity less than convincingly:  “He’s the president of the United States, you know, he… I can’t even keep up with him.”

Cut to video of Biden rolling slowly up to a bunch of reporters on a bike… and then keeling over. 

Which raises the old philosophical question: Which would you rather be – Remi Bader’s horse, or Joe Biden’s bike?

We literally have a cliché about something that is very easy to do: “it’s just like riding a bike.”

And our president can’t do that.  So, yeah.

Rather than ending on that down note, let’s run through a few fun examples of karma catching up with miscreants from this past week:

First, Dr. Fauci got covid.  

After 2 vaccinations and 2 additional boosters, and 2 years of ostentatious mask wearing and lecturing us and lying to Rand Paul, Dr. “Fooled You” caught the Flu Manchu.  (Just like many virtue-signalling multi-vaxxed empty heads like Whoopi Goldberg, Seth Meyers, Jimmy Fallon, Hoda Kotb, Savannah Guthrie, etc. and etc.)

Of course he made the same statement that every repeatedly-vaccinated goofball makes when he or she comes down with covid: “I’ve caught covid, but I’m very glad that I was vaxxed multiple times, because otherwise… I might have caught covid.  Remember people: this is a pandemic of the thrice vaccinated, or something.”   

Second, CNN’s front-runner for the 2020 Dem presidential nomination, Michael Avenatti, plead guilty to an additional raft of crimes, which together carry a statutory maximum sentence of 83 years in prison.    However, he entered his guilty plea in a California courtroom. 

Which probably means that he’ll do a few months and be out with an ankle bracelet in time to set up his exploratory committee for a Dem presidential run in 2024.  (Yes!)

Finally, my favorite story from this last week was the tale of a thief from Utah who wanted to steal some gasoline.   This guy is such a dullard – he’s the AOC of thieves!

First, he and his partner in moronity (if that’s not a word, it should be) drove up and parked next to the target truck… and right in front of a security camera.

Then he tried to use a siphon to get gas from the target truck’s tank.  But a siphon works on gravity, and even though gravity is a physical law, this dope apparently couldn’t make it work.

So he did what any problem-solving genius would do — he drilled a hole into the bottom of the gas tank.  Because his philosophy is, “sparks, schmarks.”

You can easily find the video online, and you should.  He crawls underneath the truck until only his legs are sticking out.

Then his legs kick hilariously, and he comes flying out like his shirt is on fire. Which it is.

Apparently someone once taught him the old “stop, drop and roll” rule, because he drops to the pavement and starts rolling and rolling.  As he rolls, he keeps his hips and lower body on the ground and makes about a dozen revolutions.  (The Russian judges gave him a 9.5.)

Unfortunately, the top part of his shirt is what’s on fire, and he keeps his shoulder and upper body up off the ground as he rolls maniacally, like a flammable Curly Howard.   So rather than putting the fire out, he’s basically fanning the flames.

(For added viewing pleasure, as you watch the video, shout, “Whoop!  Whoop! Whoop!” in your best Curly voice.  You’re welcome.)

Finally the flames go out, and he jumps up, tears off his shirt, and runs for his buddy’s truck, and they flee the scene, trailing the acrid stench of burnt idiot in their wake.

The funniest detail of the story?  The truck he was trying to steal gas from has a giant sign on the side: “Byrd’s Fire Protection,” beside a giant logo with flames surrounding it. 

Oh, sweet irony!

Avenatti/ Dopey the Human Torch, 2024!