More Lies, Fraud and Insurrection from Minneapolis (posted 1/16/26)

Okay dammit, I’ve got a few more thoughts on Minneapolis before I move on. 

I swear I’m trying so hard not to write about Minnesota in every column, but much like Michael Corleone in the terrible third Godfather movie, “Just when I think I’m out, they pull me back in.”

Or, to paraphrase, they are really flooding the zone with stupid, and I can’t avoid at least pointing that out in passing.

On Wednesday night, violent a-holes in Minneapolis attacked ANOTHER ICE agent. 

Unexpectedly!

This time the bad guy was an illegal who fled in his car, wrecked that, and then fled on foot.  When the agent caught up to him, he turned and fought.  When two other illegals in a nearby apartment saw what was going on, they charged out with a snow shovel and a broom handle, and started beating the ICE agent.  The illegal target then grabbed the shovel, and started beating the ICE agent.

Then – FINALLY! – the ICE agent shot the guy in the leg.  After which all three illegals went back into the apartment and barricaded themselves inside.  More ICE agents arrived and ended up getting them out and arresting all three of them. 

That’s what happened. 

Here’s the NYT lede for that story: “Federal Agent Shoots Immigrant in the Leg in Minneapolis, one week after an ICE officer killed Renee Good in city.”

No mention that the “immigrant” was an ILLEGAL.  No mention that the illegal was fighting with the agent, or that two other illegals joined in that fight.  Just an agent, going around shooting immigrants. 

A freshman writing for his high school paper could fix that headline: “Illegal Attacks ICE Agent, gets shot, one week after Renee Good hit ICE agent with her car, got shot.” 

Say it with me, people: We don’t hate the media enough!

Also, I noticed something in this story that I haven’t seen anyone comment on: the agent actually shot the illegal in the leg. 

Ignorant lefties who have watched too much tv and don’t know a gun from a gunny sack are always asking, “Why don’t police just shoot a suspect in the leg?”  And now, when an ICE agent actually did that, the left is still whine-screaming about it.  You just can’t please some people.

On the other hand, you can definitely please other people, like me, and (I’m guessing) most of you reading this right now.  Because if the ICE agents start listening to us, the next time three illegals bring a shovel, a broom handle and their fists to a gunfight, we will be very pleased indeed if the ICE agents will shoot them. And not just in the leg, and not just once.  

Meanwhile, a new fraud story came out of Minneapolis yesterday, and you’ll be shocked to learn that those damn Swedes are at it again.

HA!  I kid.  It’s the Somalis.  Because of course it is.

It turns out that $700 million dollars in cash has been sent back to Somali through the Minneapolis Airport over the last 2 years.  And that’s only the amount that was “flagged,” which I’m guessing means that the money was disclosed or found, but then still allowed to be shipped out.

I’m also guessing that that money was way less than the full amount sent out, unknown and unflagged.  The story notes that that much cash, if it was all in $100 bills, would weigh 7.7 metric tons.  Through one airport!

This phenomenon needs to be considered in context of two other recent discoveries: the $8 billion dollars of fraud (at least!) committed by Somalis in Minnesota, and the official stats from the Center for Immigration Studies that as of December 2025, 81% of Somali households in Minnesota are on welfare. 

Rumors that the other 19% own daycares have not been confirmed.

But c’mon, man.    

Logically, if Somalis have committed that much fraud and received that much welfare, there is no way they got their hands on that much cash to send back to Somalia legitimately.  Not to mention that at least some of that taxpayer-provided money has gone to support Al-Shabaab. 

Which is not some delicious dish involving skewers of meat, but a hateful jihadist terror group.

Plus, at least one Somalian married her brother to commit immigration fraud, and should be denaturalized and deported immediately.

So if you’re keeping score at home, the most common career of Somalis in Somalia appears to be piracy at sea.  Until yesterday, it appeared that the most common career of Somalis in America is piracy on land.

And now it turns out they’re also very good at piracy in the skies. 

Next up: Somalis stow away on one of Elon’s rockets to the space station, and… wait for it… Somali pirates in space! 

In light of all of this, I wish the GOP would start accurately describing what the ICE-attacking mobs and sanctuary cities are doing as insurrection.  Because the leftist politicians, media figures and foot soldiers are by definition “rising in revolt, rebellion or resistance against civil authority or an established government.”

So we need to go full court press against insurrectionist sanctuary cities and states for the next 10 months:

1. Demand that their courts and jails hold illegal detainees for ICE to pick up. 

2. Charge the top politicians who refuse to do that with whatever federal crimes are most serious: obstruction, dereliction of duty, insurrection, whatever. 

3. In the meantime, cut off all federal funding to those cities and states for any purpose that can be even tangentially tied to illegals.

My ultra-conservative heart tells me to do that directly and across the board:  Since illegals are receiving food benefits, cut off all SNAP funds; since illegals are illegally receiving schooling, cut off all K-12 federal funds; since illegals are illegally attending colleges, cut off all college loans and funding.  Since they are illegally getting housing benefits, cut off all housing funds. 

But my crystal brain – better than a crystal ball, and more strategic than my ultra-conservative heart – suggests a better way to go about this. Because the dishonest Dems and their collaborators in the MSM would say that we were denying innocent Americans in those states the funds that they should rightly be receiving. 

So instead of cutting off all funds to those states and cities, I suggest that Trump announces a new plan with a public statement along these lines:  “We don’t want to do this.  We hate it.  But those states are screwing their own citizens by taking benefits away from them and giving them to illegals.  And the residents of all non-sanctuary states and cities – which are the majority of the country – do not consent to having their money taken from them and then given to illegals in corrupt sanctuary cities and states.

“So we’ve studied the numbers, and have determined how much money they’ve been illegally giving to non-citizens, whether through SNAP funds, housing benefits, educational benefits, etc.  For example, we’ve determined that Minnesota receives $30 billion in SNAP funds annually, and gives $10 billion of that to illegals.  [I’m making these numbers up to make the point.]

“Starting now, we’ll be giving the $20 billion Minnesota needs to give SNAP benefits ONLY to American citizens.  We’ll do the same with federal funding in every other category.  This will give voters in every state the chance to tell their leaders how they want that money spent.  If they are happy to lose their apartments and have their kids go hungry while tax money pays rent for illegals and feeds them and their families, so be it.

“Again, we will continue to fully fund the states so that they can support their American citizens.  If they want to re-direct much of that money to illegals, that’s up to them, and to you, their voters.”  

The beauty of this plan is that it would put the blame directly where it belongs: on the leftist politicians and activist groups who are ripping off American taxpayers for the benefit of illegals.

I think this would be an easy and popular argument to make to the American public.  I’d point to a precedent from the 1970s.  During the oil crisis when gas shortages started popping up, the feds said that since driving slower conserved gas, the national speed limit should go down from 70 to 55 mph.  When some states balked at that, the feds stopped highway funds for those states until they complied. 

And that wasn’t even to force them to obey a law they had been breaking. Speed limits weren’t in the constitution, and states had always set their own.  It wasn’t illegal to allow people to drive 65 or 70.  The feds just didn’t like it, and decided that they knew what was best.

And if you can withhold funds to force states to make their citizens drive slower, you can sure as hell withhold funds to force states to stop breaking federal laws, and stealing billions from the taxes paid by citizens of all other states!

I’ll end on a historical parallel that I’ve noticed. 

Small Frey, Jazz Hands and hundreds of protestors have been screaming at ICE to get out, saying they don’t want them here.  First, that’s not how any of this works, as they would know if they’d ever read part of the Constitution called The Supremacy Clause. 

Second, they sound exactly like some of their co-religionists from 165 years ago, when another bunch of Democrat insurrectionists told the federal government the same thing, as they attacked Fort Sumter.  “Stay of out of Charleston!  We don’t want you here!”

Today they’re calling face-tattooed gang bangers, child molesters and murderers “our neighbors.”  Which proves that they’re even dumber than the Democrats of yesteryear, who were at least smart enough to not try to sell the public on the lie that they were concerned about their black “neighbors.” 

They were also more honest. 

Because screaming, “We won’t let you have our property!” might sound more jarring, but it’s a lot more true than today’s Dems calling foreign criminals “our neighbors”

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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A Few Thoughts on Scott Adams, & Silver Linings from Minnesota (posted 1/14/26)

Before I get started, I want to talk about the passing of Scott Adams. 

I enjoyed his Dilbert cartoons back in the day, but in recent years I’ve watched some of his podcasts, and came to admire his clear thinking and frankness.  He came out with some perceptive analysis of Trump’s persuasive strategies in 2016, when that carried some career costs, and back when I still feared that Trump was a leftist in conservative’s clothing.  (I still think Trump is not a consistent conservative, and his unforced errors drive me crazy, but I’m happy that Adams’ view of Trump was more accurate than mine!)

I also admired the way Adams faced his death.  Last May he announced that he had terminal cancer, and his conduct since then has been high-octane, old-school male: no drama or theatrical attention seeking, just a stoic acceptance and determination to soldier on and maintain his sense of humor.  He wasn’t afraid to tell the truth and lampoon foolishness, and he seemed impervious to the slings and arrows of small-minded partisans. 

Some people I trust have told me that his books are worth a read, so as soon as I finish the Jack Carr novel I’m reading now, I’m going to read a couple of Scott’s books.  I’m going to start with How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big.            

He announced a few weeks ago that he was going to be converting to Christianity, and he was clearly doing so for “Pascal’s Wager” reasons.  After a lifetime as a non-believer, he respected Christian ethics and many Christians (among them were a lot of his fans), but he seemed to be pretty openly hedging his bets.

That struck me as disingenuous, to be honest.  But as I’ve grown in my faith, I’ve realized more and more how much I have to be humble about, especially when it comes to judging what’s in others’ hearts.  And I think Adams’ story is similar to the thief on the cross’ ending: the guy has been a reprobate right up to the end, but he asks Christ to remember him when He comes into His kingdom.   

Christ’s response should be heartening to us all: “Today you will be with Me in paradise.”  And if that was good enough for the thief – and for me – I feel pretty good about my chances of meeting Scott Adams some day.

Okay, on to the news of the day. Which unfortunately means discussing the continuing chaos in Minnesota.  But because I’m a cautious optimist, I do see at least three silver linings amidst the scandals.

First, the cascade of revelations of the various fraud schemes there, as well as the insurrectionist violence and resistance to ICE and law enforcement, are drawing a ton of attention.  And even in the frozen tundra, sunlight is still the best disinfectant.  I hope the feds continue to flood the zone with investigators and law enforcement, and that conservative media and citizen journalists continue to expose the morally bankrupt leftist misbehavior in Minnesota.

Second, I’ve seen two stories within the last 36 hours of DOJ career prosecutors quitting over events in Minnesota.  One story was about “at least six” federal prosecutors in the MN US attorney’s office resigning because the DOJ was going to investigate Renee Good’s partner, and the second was about other prosecutors who resigned because the DOJ refused their request to focus an investigation on the ICE agent who shot Good.

In a perfect world, prosecutors and investigators would be non-partisan, and look into all of the facts and players on both sides.  But after eight years of Obama and four of Biden, no sentient creature believes that we live in that world.  Which doesn’t mean that I want us to be as biased and dishonest as they were. 

But in this case, as each day’s new videos and evidence have come out, they have more and more strongly exonerated the ICE agent, and implicated the Goods, and the anti-ICE “warrior” training and infrastructure that brought them to the criminal interference and obstruction that ended in Renee Good’s death. 

Hence the successively changing stories from Jacob “Small” Frey and Tampon Tim: first Renee was just dropping her kid off at daycare and inadvertently ran into an ICE action; then it turns out she went there with the goal of impeding ICE after having gone through idiot bootcamp and learning how to do so; but the agent was never in front of her car and in danger, and shot her through the side window; then he was temporarily in front of the car and shot through her windshield, but he wasn’t anywhere near being hit by her car; then he was hit by her car, but not very hard.  Etc. and etc.

But back to the wave of prosecutors who have been rage quitting, which I see as a win-win.  Not only do we get competent prosecutors focusing on real problems, but we also get rid of a bunch of partisan, deep-state bad actors, and without going through the time, effort and bureaucratic hoops to fire them, from the initial firing to the inevitable series of drawn-out appeals and re-appeals.

In that way, the faithless prosecutors who quit are similar to illegals who self-deport – they’re solving a vexing problem for us.  Not to mention that it’s entertaining to watch those whining officials just take their balls and go home. 

Or, since they’re actually trans-prosecutors – they identify as non-partisan law enforcers, but are no more that than “Lea” Thomas is a female swimmer – I guess I should say they’re taking their ovaries and going home. 

(No offense to the actual women who are reading this column!)  

Third, as more videos of anti-ICE protests get out, I think average Americans are gaining more respect for LEOs, and getting more repulsed by the “protesting” insurrectionists. 

I know that I don’t have what it takes to be in law enforcement, because just watching a few minutes of those videos makes my blood pressure spike.  I wouldn’t last half a shift before I’d be violating half the moral code I was raised with: “A soft answer turns away wrath.” “Never kick someone when they’re down.”  “Never hit a woman.” 

Not to mention, “Never yank a belligerent moron out of a car, beat him like a rented mule, tase him repeatedly, and then administer a forceful pepper spray suppository.”   

(That’s not the original King James, but I think it’s pretty close to my dad’s paraphrase.)

The sole moral teaching I would be able to live up to would be the Golden Rule, i.e. treating people the way I’d like to be treated. 

But that’s only because if I ever dyed my hair purple, pierced myself until it looked like I’d fallen face-first into an open tackle box, and then attacked cops on behalf of foreign criminals preying on innocent Americans, I would like them to beat my arse up and down the block, and then bounce my head off the curb, the squad car door and door frame as they were tossing me in to take me to jail.

I am seriously in awe at the amount of abuse our ICE agents and other LEOs are able to endure, and shocked that more protestors don’t get treated more harshly than they do. 

As far as the protestors go, I have to keep reminding myself that most of them should be pitied, because you only have to watch them for five minutes to realize that they are such obviously broken people.  Their behavior is a toxic mix of childishness, narcissism and sociopathy.  Their verbal output runs the gamut from screamed profanities to delusional insults to inane chants, and back to screamed profanities.

Take one look at their disheveled, unhealthy and bizarre appearance, and you know that they have no high-quality friendships, and they almost certainly hate their dads, if not both parents.  They are unemployable, and they are most definitely ineffable.

Sorry, not “ineffable,” which means “incapable of being expressed or described in words.”  (Because as long as we have words like “repulsive” and “beastly” and “Aieeeee!  My eyes!” we’ll be able to describe them.)

I meant “un-F-able.” 

Most definitely un-F-able.

Okay, I can’t end that way.  Because just like Scott Adams and the thief on the cross, I need mercy and forgiveness.

So I’ll end by saying that the anti-ICE insurrectionists need prayer.

Prayer, therapy, and some penitential incarceration.

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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Renee Good is Dead Because of Elite Leftist Liars (posted 1/12/26)

The Minneapolis ICE shooting has been on my mind this weekend, as I imagine it has been on many of yours.  I was already doing some research on crime and punishment in red vs. blue areas last week, when Renee Good ended up getting shot. 

And yes, there is an understood (herself) in between “getting” and “shot.”

And I know what some of you are thinking, and yes, I actually do some research and write about serious topics once in a while.  It’s not all “Pelosi is a mummy” and “Wow, is Liz Warren ever translucently white!” jokes around here.  (#wemustneverstopmockingher)

I’m going to return to some more general “why can’t leftists make sense about crime” ruminations in future columns, but for now, I’d like to throw out some thoughts on what has gone so aggravatingly wrong in Minneapolis.

To do so, I’m going to draw some connections to the Sovereign Citizens (SC) movement.  If you don’t know anything about SCs, you can search that topic, and find tons of videos of them having aggravating but hilarious run-ins with cops.  But I’ve got to warn you: the videos are addictive, and it’s easy to slide down the rabbit hole and end up watching several hours of them before you know it. 

To summarize, sovereign citizens believe – often at the urging of scammers selling kits and documents that push the SC delusion – that by declaring themselves SCs, they can exempt themselves from any state or federal laws which they find inconvenient or objectionable. 

The most common such laws are traffic and driving laws, which is why the vast majority of SC videos capture the entertaining lunacy that ensues when police pull over an SC, usually because a sovereign doesn’t believe he needs to register or insure his car, or have valid license plates or a driver’s license. 

A typical confrontation involves a sovereign citing a skewed take on an obscure or misunderstood law – they refer to Black’s Law Dictionary a lot, along with maritime law, English common law, international law, and every law but the law of unintended consequences.  (I.e., you don’t intend to get yanked out of your car, tased and cuffed, but – spoiler alert – that’s exactly where your psychotic blathering is going to take you.)

When a cop asks for license and registration, a sovereign will explain that the cop has no jurisdiction over him, and that he’s not driving, he’s “traveling,” and thus doesn’t need silly things like a license, plates or registration.  He asks for the cop’s name and badge number, but won’t identify himself, and always asks for him to call a supervisor. 

The process starts with, “I’m Officer X, and the reason I pulled you over is that you’ve got a homemade cardboard ‘plate’ instead of an official state license plate on your car.”  Depending on the cop’s patience and toleration for nonsense, the process ends anywhere from 4 minutes to a half-hour later, with the cop having to break the dope’s window, pull him out and arrest him.

In many cases, pepper spray or a taser is involved, and in my favorite cases, a cop will allow his K-9 to apply some dental persuasion – after endless warnings that the perp is going to get bit – to get the jerk to comply.

But he never complies! 

Until after a Good Boy or Girl latches on and engages in a spirited bout of “yank the moron back and forth,” at which point the sovereign screams, “What are you doing?!  He’s biting me!  What’s going on?  Why are you doing this?!”    

Good times. 

I bring this up because until Trump got re-elected and millions of leftists started systematically resisting and attacking ICE and other LEOs who are enforcing our immigration laws, I’d thought of sovereign citizens as a tiny, fringe group of dysfunctional humans with no effect on society, other than providing some entertaining YouTube videos.

But over the last year it has dawned on me that many people on the unhinged yet mainstream left have a lot in common with sovereign citizen nutjobs.  Specifically, sovereigns demonstrate four behaviors that leftists also display:

1. Sovereigns are great purveyors of self-serving double-standards.  They demand that a cop comply with every demand they have – identify yourself and your badge number; call a supervisor; prove your jurisdiction – while refusing to comply with any request from a cop (license, registration and insurance, step out of the car, etc.).

Similarly, leftists demand that cops show them warrants, or stop detaining an illegal to explain to every leftist bystander exactly what the legal basis for their action is, even as they continually refuse to follow legal commands of cops to back off, stop interfering, etc.  They demand that all LEOs be unmasked, while they insist that they themselves be allowed to commit crimes while masked.

 2. Sovereigns have a simple-minded, delusional kind of magical thinking about language that is weirdly fascinating to watch.  They act as if they can prevent a cop from doing his job just by reciting incantations.  If they say that they are “traveling, not driving” or that their car is actually “a ‘conveyance’ under maritime law,” or that they are not engaging in “commerce,” all traffic laws cease to apply.  If they repeat “I do not consent” to any order a cop gives them, the cop must let them go.    

Similarly, leftists think that a man calling himself a woman makes him a woman, and that calling a baby in the womb “a woman’s body” makes it so.  They think that calling illegals “undocumented citizens” makes them legal, and citizens.  They think that slapping a sign on their own backs that say “PRESS” or “MEDIC” gives them unhindered access and control over any crime scene.  

3. Sovereigns fancy themselves as experts on the law and their rights…and then proceed to demonstrate that they are Crockett-level stupid.  They insist that a cop has to call a supervisor if they request one.  (He doesn’t.) That a cop can’t make them get out of their car.  (He can.)  That impeding an investigation or resisting arrest aren’t crimes they can be charged with.  (They are.)   That identifying as a “sovereign citizen” means something.  (It doesn’t.)   

Similarly, ICE resisters believe that legally detaining a suspected illegal is “kidnapping.  (It isn’t.)  That taking them to a detention center where their identity and legal status can be confirmed is “disappearing” them.  (It isn’t.)  That a mayor or governor can defy federal law and prevent federal law enforcers from doing their jobs, and can arrest them if they do.  (Aw hell no!)  That calling yourself a “legal observer” means that you can disregard legal commands and hinder ICE actions.  (Nope!)     

4. Finally, sovereigns’ special brand of idiocy usually results in some great FAFO moments, which is what initially drew me into watching way too many SC videos.  Over and over again, a cocky sovereign starts out recording himself while he lectures the police about how he doesn’t have to obey any laws, and ends up in cuffs, coughing on pepper spray and crying like a little beeyotch about how he doesn’t understand what’s going on. 

And before last week, radical leftists have provided many examples of schadenfreude-tastic entertainment.  I remember watching a guy screaming at the cops, only to catch a bean-bag shotgun load in the groin, not to mention the idiot dancing around in an inflated dinosaur costume, until a cop squirted some pepper spray into the air vent in the costume, and he started staggering and flopping around like Joe Biden trying to step over a sandbag.  

But Renee Good’s case demonstrates the tragic side of the predictable results when mobs of imbeciles attack and harass law enforcement doing their jobs.  She was apparently as delusional as the most addled sovereign citizen, imagining herself as a brave iconoclast, resisting the false authority of an illegitimate legal system.

In reality, she was a brainwashed AWFL, steeped in hatred of authority, and cosplaying as a resister of fascism.  She had gone through some half-assed training and identified herself as a “legal observer” — which carries as much weight as “sovereign citizen” – and she and her “partner” inserted themselves into a legitimate law enforcement action, intending to impede it. 

A second wave of bystander videos show that she used her car to block the street, while her partner got out to record what I imagine they both thought was going to be some self-dramatizing social-justice-warrior street theatre.  She was there, obstructing for at least 3-6 minutes, at one point rhythmically honking her horn and dancing in her seat, narcissistically flouting the law and goading the cops. 

And she ended up orchestrating her own tragic death. 

For a great overview of the legal issues involved, check out a veteran prosecutor’s RedState article titled, “Minneapolis Is Not Even a Close Call.”

I wish the elite leftists who have been egging on their foot soldiers would read that, and stop adding fuel to the fire, because I think they’re clearly responsible for the growing conflicts that resulted in Renee Good’s self-destructive foolishness.  By preaching that ICE are fascists and that fighting them is a moral good, they delude them, and shield them from a healthy sense of  guilt and shame – or at least a basic sense of self-preservation! – that might otherwise have dissuaded them from the illegal path they took. 

Because threatening that ICE agent’s life by driving a 4000-pound vehicle toward him was not the first crime Renee Good committed that day.  When she drove to the scene of a legal law enforcement action, blocked the road and began a series of actions intended to draw more protestors/resisters, she interfered with law enforcement, a felony when accompanied by other illegal actions.

Actions such as disobeying lawful orders and resisting arrest, which she did when she refused to comply with cop’s orders to get out of her car.  (The SCOTUS case that said you must get out of your vehicle when a cop tells you to is called Pennsylvania vs. Mimms…which I first learned about while watching sovereign citizen videos.) 

Uninformed leftists who defend Renee Good driving toward the cop say that she wasn’t trying to hit him, but only to get away, which does not help her case.  First, because the law says that her intention is irrelevant, if her actions caused a cop to reasonably believe that she was going to hit him (which he did, because she did).  Second because “trying to get away” is fleeing/eluding, another felony. 

If the leftist politicians and media figures who claim to care about the leftist ICE resisters weren’t manipulating them for their own political purposes, they’d tell them the obvious truth:  Our immigration laws were democratically and legitimately passed, and they state that anybody who came here illegally has committed a crime and is subject to deportation.  Any agency or personnel who are enforcing those laws are behaving legally, and it’s a crime to try to impede, harass, interfere with or stop them.  So don’t do it! 

Because the best way to stop being stupid is for stupid to hurt. 

Good parents know this; slapping a toddler’s hand when she reaches for the stove is better than letting her touch it.  Good governments know it too.  An early arrest and some time in the county jail, or picking up garbage on the side of the highway is better than a slap on the wrist and then years in the state pen after you graduate to major felonies.

I’m thrilled that the administration is flooding Minnesota with 1000 more LEOs, because this kind of ongoing, slow-motion insurrection can’t be allowed to stand.  

And because we’re way past the “play stupid games, win stupid prizes” phase. 

We’re now at “play illegal games, win an early grave.”     

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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Minnesota, Mamdani and Maduro, Oh My!(posted 1/9/26)

 We’re not even 10 days into the new year, and the elite lefties have already given us enough material to mock them about until Arbor Day, 2028.  Consider just the three examples of the cascading lawlessness in Minnesota, Mamdani’s horrific start as NYC mayor, and the Democrats’ towering hypocrisy about our incredible capture of Maduro and Mrs. Maduro.

By this time, you would have thought we’d be aware of all of the possible scandals that could come out of Minnesota.  However, as the third Wise Man said when he arrived late to the manger, “But wait! There’s myrrh!”   (Terrible dad joke?  Check.  Still hanging on to Christmas? Check.)

I am so happy to see the White House sending a whole team of fraud investigators from the DOJ to Minnesota.  Not just because it’s always satisfying to see some bad actors get what’s coming to them, but because as the revelations of systemic waste and criminality grow, there will be an impetus to apply the same scrutiny to the vast corruption throughout our federal and state governments. 

And that process has the potential to do a world of good.

It’s hard to believe how easy it was for Nick Shirley to pull out one or two pieces from the Somali scammer Jenga tower, which then immediately caused the accelerating collapse of the whole rotten mess.  And as a former English prof and recovering grammar nerd, I still can’t get over the beautifully evocative symbol of the multi-billion dollar fraud: the sign for the “Learing Center.”

I’m not immune to the occasional typo myself; regular readers will have spotted one or two in my columns from time to time.  (It’s no excuse that I do most of my writing after midnight, nor that medicinal bourbon is sometimes involved.) (Or is it?)  But still, a mistake in an email or an internet post is one thing.

A glaring error in a professionally printed sign is another.  Some Somali had to get hold of a computer – probably provided by a corrupt NGO called “Empowering our Neighbors, LLC” at the low, low cost of $1.2 million to taxpayers.  Then he had to try out several different names, finally landing on the generic-sounding “Quality Learning Center.”

Except that he wrote it as, “Kwalitee Learing Centaur.” 

Fortunately for him, he was able to hire a copy-editing service – probably provided by a corrupt NGO called “Literacy for our Neighbors, LLC” (that’s another $1.2 mil from the taxpayers).  And they cleaned up “Quality” and “Center,” but missed “Learing.”

When he took that verbiage to a sign-making business – “Empowering Signs for our Neighbors, LLC – which is located in a 180 -square-foot store-front in a six-business strip mall across from the railroad tracks.  (Amount billed to the taxpayers from those six businesses in 2025? $214 million.)

And because the workers there have been in this country for 10 years but still speak only in the series of clicks, whistles and glottal pops of Somali, nobody caught the missing “n.” 

Annnddddd…a multi-billion dollar fraud ring collapses, and leftist, race-hustling crooks in Minnesota get to lear a hard lesson!    

And that’s not to mention the latest disaster, with the foolish woman losing her life trying to run down the ICE agent.  Which was the predictable outcome of unhinged leftist media, politicians, and activists brainwashing gullible people by screaming, “ICE is the Gestapo! Enforcing our laws is fascist!” for the last several years.

What did they think was going to happen?

But just when you thought no leftists could be crazier than the Minnesota leftists, Zorro Mamdani took the oath of office in NYC and said, “Hold my Koran and watch this.”

And he hired a recidivist criminal to advise him on crime, and a raging anti-Semite (I know: which one?) to take charge of choosing personnel, and he started an initiative to allow disgruntled tenants on welfare to go after landlords whom they don’t think are giving them their money’s worth for the zero dollars they are paying for rent-controlled apartments. 

And for the leader of this “fix housing problems” unit, he chose a loon named Cea Weaver, who has more red flags than a May Day parade marching past Lenin’s tomb in Moscow.      

First are her eyes.  Look up “crazy eyes” in a dictionary, and right there is a picture of Cea Weaver.

Second, right before she got appointed, she started deleting all of her past social media with both translucently white, bony hands.  (This gal is so white she makes Liz Warren look like Idi Amin.)  (#wemustneverstopmockingher)

Third, because that’s not the way the internet works, some of her old posts and videos starting coming out.  And…yikes!

Turns out she really hates white people, which makes her as self-hating as those secular Jews carrying pro-Hamas signs at Ivy League protests.  She said that home ownership is racist and white supremacist.  She said that she wanted to “impoverish the white middle class” and that her goal is to “decrease the value of real estate.”  (Finally, a leftist political promise you can believe!) 

My favorite quote of hers is a juicy morsel of malignant misanthropy encased in a thick crust of academic-speak: “For centuries, we’ve really treated property as an individualized good and not a collective good,” and in the future we will transition to treating it as a collective good under a model of ‘shared equity.’  [That] will mean that families, especially white families, are going to have a different relationship to property.”

Translation: Your “different relationship to property” means that you won’t have any of it anymore.

Usually, this kind of zealot has fire in her belly, and can’t wait to get into power so she can immediately start grinding her capitalist enemies to dust beneath her.  But not Cea.

Because when a reporter stopped her and posed a few questions to her outside of her Brooklyn brownstone – in an area that white interlopers like herself have gentrified, by the way – she cried and ran back into her home.

I’m not making that up.  She literally burst into tears and fled into her house. 

But the star of the show – make that the sh*t show – is Mamdani himself, who gave what had to be the creepiest inaugural address ever.  He doubled down on all of his socialist rhetoric, and produced the chilling sound bite about how he is going to replace “the frigidity of rugged individualism with the warmth of collectivism.” 

That sound you hear is George Orwell – and 100 million victims of communist “warmth” – rolling in their graves.

Which brings us to Trump’s theatrical raid on another purveyor of collectivist warmth, the Venezuelan dictator Nicolas Maduro.  The raid itself was so spectacular – script by Shane Black, directed by Michael Bay, with the working title, “Mission Impossible 12: Grabbing Maduro!” – that even the most partisan Dem couldn’t criticize it.

So they immediately moved on to throwing every possible criticism at the wall, to see what sticks.  “It’s illegal.  It’s a kidnapping.  Maduro is the legitimate president.  What’s going to happen next?  Why didn’t the raiders capture the 47 people below Maduro on the commie flow-chart?” Etc.

There are actually legitimate questions and a lot of uncertainty about what the aftermath will be.  But rather than be serious statemen and raise those objections, the Dems couldn’t help but act like clowns, and reveal their own double-standards and hypocrisy.

Like Cryin’ Cea Weaver, they don’t seem to recognize that the internet and videotape exists, and you can’t run away from past statements you’ve made. 

Statements like Joe Biden’s (RIP) tweet from June of 2020: “Trump talks tough on Venezuela, but admires thugs and dictators like Nicolas Maduro.  As President, I will stand with the Venezuelan people and for democracy.”

That one aged like milk, didn’t it?

Or how about the fact that the Biden administration removed sanctions on Venezuela in 2023 in exchange for Maduro’s promise that Venezuela would hold free and fair elections.  Annnndddd… nope!  After Maduro lost in 2024, he just stayed in power and started persecuting Venezuelan opponents.

Thwarted by the real world as they so often are, on Biden’s way out the door last year, he and the Dems put out a $25 million bounty for info leading to the arrest or conviction or Maduro.  

So they were hoping that some mercenaries, or possible Jason Bourne or Reacher, would raid Maduro’s base, capture him, and spirit him away to the US to stand trial.  But when Trump did just that, the left raced to begin the caterwauling.

Which was hilarious, because just like in the raid on the Iranian nuke sites, the action was over before the usual suspects could even make their signs, hit the streets, and start with the chanting.

Still, it was fun to watch unemployed leftist ne’er-do-wells (When will they do well?  Ne’er!) put down their anime furry porn and stop in the middle of their latest piercing to rally on the streets against the evil, genocidal bombing of Venezuela. 

Annnndddd…the bombing is over!

It was also very entertaining to watch AWFLs and other nonbinary white guys protesting and weeping for the poor Venezuelans, on a split screen with scenes of thousands of wildly celebrating Venezuelans in city streets all over the world. 

It’s a cliché because it’s true: Trump’s superpower is getting his opponents to take the “20” side of every 80-20 issue, and to defend the indefensible.

So to recap, here are the groups and individuals the Democrats have rallied on behalf of since Trump has returned to office: human-smuggling, wife-beating gang member Kilmar; narco-terrorists in Miami Vice boats speeding toward America to profit from poisoning and murdering Americans; judges who blatantly violate laws to help illegals evade our law enforcement; a trust-fund puss who shot a CEO in the back like a coward; leftist trans-adjacent mentally ill or evil people who murdered Charlie Kirk and Christian school kids in two separate massacres; comically transparent Somali land-pirates; and a vicious leftist dictator who they were vociferously condemning 28 minutes ago. 

Great job, lefties!

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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We Don’t Hate the Media, or Tim Walz, Enough (posted 1/8/26)

First note: I am going to have an announcement about the possible return of some version of the Cautious Optimism site soon, so stay tuned.

Second note: I drafted most of this column Wednesday morning, before the ICE agent in Minneapolis fired on the woman who interfered with an ICE raid and hit him with her car, in the aftermath of which Tim Walz added a new, pathetic chapter to the story of his terrible behavior during his entire political career.

I’m filing this column under one of my recurring categories: We Don’t Hate the Media Enough.

Consider this: the Somalian fraudsters in Minnesota haven’t come up with any new scams that we know of over the last couple of years.  They’ve just continued doing the industrial-scale fraud that they’ve been doing for the last couple of decades, since they gave up ocean-going piracy for land-based piracy. 

And Tim Walz isn’t any more implicated in the utter incompetence and negligence – or more likely,  blatant corruption, with all of the billion$ of fraudulent taxpayer ripoffs – than he was 18 months ago, or 16 months ago, or 13 months ago.     

But 18 months ago he became Que Mala’s nominee to be one heartbeat away from the presidency.  And 16 months ago he was campaigning hard for that office.  And 13 months ago he was on the presidential election ballot in all 50 states, and ended up getting the votes of tens of millions of Americans.  (Addled, unwise Americans, sure.  But still.  Americans.)

And for all of that time, the nationwide legacy media and journalists – the vaunted Fourth Estate; the guardians of our liberty; the crucial and necessary speakers of capital “T” Truth to capital “P” Power; the beneficiaries (along with all of us) of the cherished first amendment to our Constitution – did not write or speak one word about the tsunami of fraud that surrounded and enveloped Tim Walz, from his twinkle toes to the fingertips of his jazz hands.

And then one 20-something kid with a Mr. Microphone and a $100 video camera from Best Buy spent one afternoon walking around and showing Somalian fraud-atoria in grimy buildings with misspelled signs, and asking dead-eyed scammers where the kids were, and getting only a series of clicks and whistles, followed by, “No habla ingles.  You go now!” 

And before he could say, “That’s Spanish, not Somalian,” the doors to the fraud parlors were shut in his face.

And that kid, with his budget of 12 dollars and a bus pass, did what our finest J-school grads and the billion-dollar institutions propping them up could not and would not do: he told the truth about the corrupt leftist machine running Minnesota, and by implication, the truth about Tim Walz.

“But maybe the MSM just focused on more important stories, in their rigorous vetting of Walz?” you’re not asking, because you’re not as dumb as Jasmine Crockett.

Because: nope. 

Do you remember what the MSM told us about him, and his background?  He was a regular guy, a man’s man who coached football, and hunted, and bravely served our country in the National Guard, where he gained valuable combat experience. 

Except… when he tried to do a photo-op in his new hunting vest and Elmer Fudd hat, he struggled with his shotgun like AOC struggled with the SAT.   He looked like he had never even seen a shotgun before, let alone fired one.

And when he talked about football, he sounded like…I don’t know, Pete Buttigieg talking about football.  (Remember when Walz mentioned “calling a pick-six?”) 

And as a regular guy raised correctly in the Midwest, I can tell you that none of my regular guy friends ever flounced around like…how can I put this delicately?… an over-eager, leotard-wearing cast member in a huge Bob Fosse dance number.

And his time in the National Guard – where he did serve, and God bless him for it – did NOT involve any front-line combat.  Or even rear-echelon proximity to combat.  Or even being within the penumbras or emanations of the nearest theatre of war wherein combat might conceivably have broken out. 

In fact, after decades in the Guard, when it actually came time for the unit he was supposed to lead to go into combat, Terrible Timmy immediately retired from the Guard, leaving his troops to be led by someone else. 

But of course, we learned none of this from the legacy media, because they did everything they could to portray him as the exact opposite of what he really was, and is.  And the only possible defense they have is that by August of 2024 they were absolutely exhausted.

After all, they’d spent years covering for Joe Biden: ignoring his corruption; hiding his son’s status as a crack aficionado and bagman who funneled Chicom and Ukrainian oligarch cash to the Big Guy; pretending “Dr.” Jill was a doctor, and 9% inflation was hunky dory, and that all of us regularly trip over sandbags and fall up staircases and poop on the Pope. 

Then they had to turn on a dime and start pretending that Que Mala was erudite, and smart, and competent.  And that was no easy task. 

Then she drops Tampon Tim in their laps, and gives them their marching orders: Take this lunatic weirdo and make him look like a normal, Midwestern dude’s dude, so we don’t get completely wiped out among male voters.

The rest was history, and the corrupt, soulless, existentially dishonest MSM came dangerously close to lying Jazz Hands and the Cackler into the White House only 14 months ago. 

For that, we can never hate them enough.     

And so, I suggest that we say to Tim Walz, and the armies of over-paid, moral homunculi in the mainstream media – in the words of thousands of Somali scammers who have now gone to ground all over the Mogadishu-St. Paul area…

“You go now!” 

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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Dems Get out of the Gate Quickly in 2026 (posted 1/5/26)

Well, the elite Democrats are starting off 2026 the same way they ended 2025: as condescending, creepy hypocrites. 

Under “condescending,” behold the wonder that is Larry Sabato.  You may remember Sabato because he’s the University of Virginia politics professor who founded the Center for Politics, which is laughably described as “nonpartisan.” 

But you probably don’t.  Because who cares? 

On the other hand, he is a near-perfect representative of our arrogant, educated, elite pundit class.  He’s highly educated, and even though he has nothing but disdain for regular people, he touts his Center as “work[ing] to promote civic engagement and participation.”  But I would argue that he’s no smarter than I am.

He has a lot political opinions, and is happy to yammer on about them.  So do I.  He has a BA, an MA and a PhD.  So do I.  He was Phi Beta Kappa.  So was I.  He was a Rhodes Scholar.  I…wasn’t.  He got his PhD from Oxford.  I…didn’t.  He has a earned a ton of money and a very high media profile by writing about politics.  I…

Look, let’s not get hung up on these meaningless comparisons.  Because everybody is different, and I have other, more impressive qualifications in my CV than he does.  For example, was Larry Sabato a four-time runner-up for People magazine’s Sexiest Man of the Year?  (Screw you, Patrick Dempsey, Chris Evans, Idris Alba and George Clooney!) 

My wife is hotter, my kids are better, and my Wonder Dog outclasses his low-IQ little stripper dog like the ones that several of the Kardashians probably carry around in their purses. 

Ok sure, I don’t know anything about his wife or kids, or if he even has a dog.  But I said what I said, and I stand by it 100%.

Anyway, Larry Sabato couldn’t even get 48 hours into 2026 without proving that he is a condescending jerk.  The proof came in his response to a statement by the new anchor of the CBS Evening News, someone named Tony Dokoupil.  

On New Year’s Day, Dokoupil started his tenure with an on-air mea culpa, acknowledging that most Americans don’t trust the legacy media any more. “On too many stories, the press has missed the story. Because we’ve taken into account the perspective of advocates and not the average American. Or we put too much weight in the analysis of academics or elites, and not enough on you.” 

To which all reasonably perceptive Americans said, “Duh!” 

Even though CBS has a lot to atone for, and the only rational response to Dokoupil’s message is, “We’ll believe it when we see it,” we should still allow ourselves to be pleasantly surprised when CBS makes even a baby step in the direction of doing the right thing.  Acknowledging reality and admitting fault is a good way for them to start a new year. 

But Sir Lawrence of Sabato begs to differ.  Because he immediately pushed his metaphorical glasses to the end of his nose and dialed the snoot factor up to 11 in a tweeted response to Dokoupil: “Absolutely! You wouldn’t want ‘academics and elites’ who have actually studied a subject to outweigh the off-the-cuff opinions of village idiots.”

[Sidebar: In this one response, Sabato showed himself to be the polar opposite of the late great William F. Buckley (peace be upon him), who famously said, “I’d rather be governed by 300 names drawn randomly from the Boston phone book than by the faculty of Harvard University.”]

Got that?  If you disagree with Larry Sabato and his ilk, you’re a village idiot!

In case you’ve forgotten the lofty goal of Larry’s Center at UVA, I’ll repeat it: “working to promote civic engagement and participation.” 

And obviously, the best way to accomplish that is to smear any dissenters as pitchfork-wielding mouth-breathers. “Listen up, morons!  You’re all idiots, and your uninformed opinions are crap.  So ‘engage with civics’ by bowing down to me as I lecture you on your wrongness, and then get out there and ‘participate,’ by voting exactly the way we experts tell you to!”  

That level of clueless narcissism is hard to comprehend.  Sabato’s job for decades has been to eat, drink and breathe politics.  And yet, in the Year of Our Lord 2026, he can still unselfconsciously and unironically tout the opinions of “academics and elites who have actually studied a subject,” as if we’ve all just woken up from a deep, decades-long, magical sleep.

After all, medical elitists like Dr. Fauci and Dr. Scarf – I don’t remember her name and won’t waste the time to look it up, but you know who I’m talking about – “actually studied” communicable diseases for years.

Annnnddddd…they said covid came from delicious pangolins that untermenschen ChiComs gobbled like circus geeks devouring live chickens; and that masks would stop the spread; and that the vax would keep you from getting it; no, the vax and then 18 more boosters; and that six feet of distance would keep you safe; and that you could attend screaming mob protests of St. George Floyd’s death safely, but going to church would kill you. 

And intelligence elites spent a lifetime actually studying intel and disinformation. 

Annnnddddd… 51 of them swore that Hunter Biden’s laptop – which contained hours of video of Hunter Biden snorting crack off of the behinds of hookers of many nations, along with Hunter Biden’s emails proving that he was a bagman for ChiCom apparatchiks and Ukrainian oligarchs, and that he kicked up 10% of his illegal bribes to “the big man” – was actually a Russian fabrication.  And that the non-existent Trump pee tape existed, and was proof that he was a Moscow-ian Candidate.

And our leftist policy experts assured us that the border couldn’t be closed without radical new legislation, and that illegals weren’t getting SNAP benefits or Medicaid, and that the Somali Learing Center was a world-class educational institution, well worth the $8 million per student cost.

And our leftist media experts assured us that Jen “Circle Back” Psaki and KJP were geniuses, and that the act of a male declaring himself a female magically turns all of his Y chromosomes to Xs.  And that Joe Biden was mentally sharp, with the physical vigor of an Olympic triathlete gold medalist whose strongest events were stair climbing and long-jumping over sandbags.    

But you don’t have to look to the army of lefty elite “experts” who have been relentlessly wrong or lying about everything all the time.  You can just look at the King of Elite Academics: Larry Sabato.

In addition to all of his academic credentials, Sabato started a website to make political predictions, and he modestly named it, “Sabato’s Crystal Ball.” 

Because of course he did.

Annnnddd… Sabato’s Crystal Ball has been about as accurate as a Magic Eight Ball. 

Unexpectedly!

In 2016, Sabato predicted a Cankles McPantsuit blowout win against Trump by an electoral vote count of 322-216, almost the exact opposite of what happened.  He also missed the House and Senate majorities. 

He got 2020 “right,” when Joey Gaffes won in the Most Legitimate Election Ever™.  (That was the one that hinged on 11 million Democrat voters who had never been seen before November of 2020, and who have never been seen since.)

But you’ll be shocked to know that he wrongly predicted that Que Mala would win the Electoral College (and the presidency) by 14 EC votes, when as we all know, she got wiped out by nearly 100 EC votes. 

Because God exists, and He loves us.

So if I’m reading the record correctly, the Village Idiots went 2-1, while Sabato went 1-2, with a big asterisk in front of the 1.

Accordingly, if it’s all the same to you, Larry, you can keep your Crystal Ball, and I’ll rely on my Crystal Brain, along with my Magic Eight Ball.

Which I just asked three questions: 

1. Is Larry Sabato half as smart as he thinks he is? 

2. Can a randomly chosen village idiot out-think Larry Sabato? 

3. Can Larry Sabato distinguish his fundament from a hole in the ground?

And I got, “My sources say no,” “You may rely on it,” and, “Reply hazy, try again,” respectively.   

Would you look at that?  The column’s already over, and I only got to “condescending elite Dems.”

So “creepy” and “hypocritical” Dems will be my topics next time. 

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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Looking Forward to the New Year (posted 1/1/26)

I love New Year’s Day.  It comes in the middle of the 12 days of Christmas, during a long break spent with family; there is good football to watch; and I savor the chance to look back at the past year, and forward to the new one.   

In my last column I looked back at some highlights and lowlights of 2025, but the year certainly ended with all kinds of stupid.  Consider those cheese-eating surrender monkeys the French, for example.   They have a famed national celebration every New Years Eve in Paris, with huge crowds on the Champs-Elysees and a gigantic concert, followed by fireworks at the Arc de Triomphe at midnight.

Except for this year.  Because it is now too dangerous.  The French government no longer feels it can keep its own citizens safe in its capital on a national holiday.  A police statement alluded to “unpredictable crowd movements” as one cause for worry. 

You know, like when the church parking lot gets crowded on a Sunday at noon, or when lots of Gator fans descend on the stadium an hour before kickoff.  You can never be too careful when you’ve got crowds.  Especially the kind which are prone to moving around.    

So the French canceled their concert, and replaced it with a pre-recorded video broadcast.  Because nothing says, “Let’s celebrate this significant moment!” like… reruns. 

There will still be fireworks, but officials “urged people to watch from home.”  Because there is no better way to appreciate the visceral experience of immense colorful explosions filling the sky and cacophonous blasts you can feel in your chest than…to watch it on a tv screen. 

The evasive banality of these official French government pronouncements demonstrate that they believe that some things are better left unsaid. Especially when those things involve mobs of violent practitioners of a certain Religion of Peace™ whom the French have been allowing into their country for decades now.

Annnnddddd…no more celebrations, Frenchie!  Watch it on tv.

Meanwhile, here at home we have geniuses like Eric Swalwell, who is now running for California governor.    And if California Dems vote him into office, they’ll deserve the reign of error, flatulence and unguarded pillow talk with ChiCom honey traps that will ensue.

Swalwell’s latest campaign promise is a doozy.  He is pledging to arrest ICE agents and take away their driver’s licenses. 

You read that right.  ICE agents – the rare federal employees who actually have a proper constitutional job to do and are actually doing it correctly – will not get away with enforcing our laws on Swalwell’s watch.  Following in the footsteps of the seditious six – who told our military that they shouldn’t follow illegal orders, and then couldn’t point to any such orders they’ve been given, because those orders don’t exist – Swalwell tried to cover himself by using the weaseliest of weasel words.

To wit, “And if they commit crimes then they’re going to be charged with crimes, if it’s falsely imprisoning people, if it’s kidnapping, if it’s assault and battery, they’re going to be held accountable.” 

That kind of vacuous statement might work for the motley collection of AWFLs, sufferers from blunt force head trauma and CTEs, and non-English speakers who make up the Democrat voting base in California.

But the rest of us know that of course ICE agents committing those crimes would be charged with those crimes.  We also know that they are NOT committing those crimes.  Because detaining and then arresting people who broke our immigration laws isn’t “falsely imprisoning” them, and taking them off the street and legally holding them prior to deportation isn’t “kidnapping” them. 

And “assault and battery” is what happens to my ears and brain when Eric Swalwell starts talking on tv when my remote is not within arm’s reach.       

The driver’s license threat is especially rich.  When normal Americans think “problems with driver’s licenses in California,” they think about foreigners who just got here two weeks ago, and were issued voter’s registration paperwork and a CDL, despite the fact that they don’t know enough English to read road signs, or spell “CDL.”

Maybe Swalwell thinks that the total number of driver’s licenses is a fixed amount, and he needs to start confiscating licenses from American citizens who are enforcing our laws and keeping us safe, so that he can give those licenses to every Juan, Achmed and Apu with a hankerin’ to climb up behind the wheel of a 15-ton 18-wheeler and start flattening sedans and SUVs like JB Pritzker trampling people between him and a buffet.   

Where was I?

Oh yeah.  Looking forward to the new year.

I don’t do hard-and-fast resolutions, but I do like to set goals, and I’ve got a lot of items on my own personal bucket list that still need to be checked off:

First, of course, I’d like to get the CO website up and running again.

I’d like to fast-rope down from a helicopter just in time to prevent a crime from happening, or stop a useful idiot from talking a naïve young person into voting Democrat.

I’d like to dive into a body of water with a knife clenched between my teeth.

After being a four-time runner up, I’d like to finally win a People Magazine’s Sexiest Man of the Year award.

I’d like to win a Nobel Prize, just so that in my speech I could work in a Pelosi mummy joke, a Cherokee Liz Warren joke (#wemustneverstopmockingher), and a Pritzker dirigible joke. 

I’d like a law enforcement agency to require me to register my hands as lethal weapons. 

I’d like to be at a public event where I could interrupt an idiot making a land acknowledgment by standing up and yelling, “Either give the land back or shut your yap, you insufferable, virtue-signaling D-bag!” 

But enough about me and my personal goals. 

Politically, my over-arching resolution would be for us conservatives to wield the power the voters gave us as aggressively as the Democrats always do when they are in power.  Even if we don’t lose the House in November, time is fleeting and there is a ton of work to do, so we need to make hay while the sun shines, on many fronts:

1.Do everything possible to speed up deportations, and encourage illegals to self-deport.  Crack down on all benefits that serve as magnets for illegals: stop them from getting Medicaid funds, food stamps, illegal employment and college funding.  Defund the NGOs who have been conduits for money for themselves, and to enable illegals to get here and stay here.    

2. Use the power of federal money to incentivize insurrectionist “sanctuary” blue cities and states to obey federal law or suffer the consequences.  Take highway funds away from states who illegally issue any drivers’ licenses to illegals; take federal matching funding away from states who have been using those funds on boondoggles like the CA bullet train.  Withdraw funding wherever it can be legally withdrawn to stop taxpayers from unwillingly subsidizing wind and solar farms that produce expensive electricity that must then be subsidized again when it shows up in electric bills.

3. Use the power of every law and regulation – not as dishonest lawfare, but as aggressive enforcement of laws that have long been ignored or thwarted.  Arrest and prosecute every person who interferes with or attacks ICE, border patrol or the national guard.  Make examples of judges who break the law or rule frivolously; impeach a handful of them where you can, and arrest and prosecute those like the WI judge who was just convicted for helping an illegal escape ICE officers.   

4. Use conservative media to highlight the truth – and counter the MSM – on every story they distort or lie about, i.e. all of the stories.  Make the really bad actors famous – violent illegals, Somali scammers, brother-marrying anti-Semites in Congress – and highlight our wins (lower crime rates and unemployment, an improving economy, etc.).  Build on our recent successes in social media, and keep the spotlight on Dem malfeasance          

5. In a perfect world, I’d like us to keep the filibuster.  But in the real world, I’m afraid it’s time to get rid of it, both because the Dems will certainly do so the minute they get back in power (they already did, with judges), and because they’ve repeatedly demonstrated that they aren’t good-faith negotiators.  We can’t continue to fight with one arm tied behind our back, and we can’t continue to bring strongly worded letters to a knife fight.  If we don’t, the Dems will prevent us from making health-care reforms, and then will profit by blaming us for the failed Obamacare that they are 100% responsible for.     

We made some very good progress in 2025, but we need to keep the pedal to the metal in 2026.

I hope you all had a great holiday season, and are looking forward to the new year as much as I am!

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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Looking Back at 2025 (posted 12/29/25)

 I hope everybody had a great Christmas.  We had a peaceful and quiet one.  In recent years I’ve gotten into the 12 Days of Christmas liturgical tradition, which was not a part of my Baptist upbringing, but which is appealing for several reasons.  I’ve always loved Christmas, and any chance to extend that holy/holiday feeling for longer seems intrinsically good.  (I know that Hanukkah is not a major Jewish holiday, but I’ve always like the idea of 8 days of celebration…so you know I’d be up for 12!)

And because I own a few rental houses in a college town, I really appreciate the feeling of a temporarily emptier town, and the opportunity that brings to do some maintenance work without having to work around tenants’ schedules, traffic, etc.  On the agenda this week is some yard clean-up – I’ve already removed three pickup loads of leaves and limbs – some minor carpentry, repairing and painting a picket fence, and repairing and painting some wooden window screens.    

I also appreciate the chance to look back at the year that has passed, and to look forward to the new year, too.  In this column I’ll look back at some highlights and lowlights of 2025, and in the next column – the last one for this year – I’ll look forward to some of my hopes and fears for 2026.

Obviously, Trump taking office was a huge deal, and a great relief after the four benighted years of the Cadaver and the Cackler and their horrible policies and personnel.  Trump’s most dramatic accomplishment was completely closing the border after 16 minutes in office – and after years of Biden and the Dems feigning an inability to close the border without “comprehensive immigration reform” legislation. 

(By which they meant opening the borders to millions of unvetted immigrants to ensure a leftist voting majority forever.)    

The deportations, though frustratingly slow, have been great too.  The relatively slow pace of deportations has not been because of lack of trying, and it’s been infuriating to watch the same Dems who allowed millions to stampede in – with NO due process to protect American citizens – now insist that every obviously deportable alien be given full, years-long due-process hearings.

Still, Trump’s move to offer cash and a plane ticket to those who will self-deport is smart, and has been paying dividends; I think around twice as many have self-deported as have been caught and forcibly deported.  And as long as Homan and Trump keep pushing aggressively, I would guess that more and more will self-deport, as the realization sinks in that Hulk Homan means business, and they’re going to be caught and tossed eventually.

I think another high point has been the improvements in the first year of Trump’s second term compared to his first.  The first time around, his win came as a surprise to many, and with no previous governing experience, Trump had to fumble his way up a very steep learning curve.  He left way too many oppositional deep-state bureaucrats in place, and his appointments were a mixed bag, with a lot of misses. 

And I’m not just talking about Amarosa and the Mooch.  (Terrible drive-time FM radio shock-jock duo, terrible political appointments.) Pence was a good man but an empty suit as VP; I can’t remember a thing about Rex Tillerson as Sec State.  I actually liked Mattis as Sec Def and Jeff Sessions as AG, but they both had some self-inflicted wounds. 

With the possible exception of Pam Bondi, I can’t think of an appointment this time around that hasn’t been at least as strong, and usually a marked improvement over their counterparts in the first term.  JD is a boss; Mario is doing half a dozen jobs and all of them well; Stephen Miller and Hegseth have taken everything the sleazy MSM could throw at them and spit right back in their eye.

And Tom Homan is my hero.   

Trump clearly put together a team during his four years in the wilderness, and he hit the ground running.  In a functional nation with sane Democrats in it, Trump could have passed much of his agenda through congress.  In the dysfunctional mess Trump inherited, he has had to sign a boatload of EOs and push through the imperfect omnibus Big Beautiful Bill, and those have been vast improvements over the last four years, and clear improvements over the first year of his first term. 

He’s also laid the groundwork for good things to happen in the near- and mid-term future.  The regulation cuts and tax cuts that kick in next month will help the economy, as will the trade deals that are bringing tons of investment into our country.  The appellate courts and SCOTUS are likely to grind along and keep knocking down the partisan lower-court judges’ attempts to stop every good thing that is happening, from immigration enforcement to the economy to pushing back on the discrimination and trans lunacy embodied in DEI ideology.

That’s not to say that everything is going great.  The DOGE effort was noble and much-needed, but has lost a lot of momentum with Elon’s departure.  While Trump’s tariffs push has provided some useful leverage in trade negotiations in some cases, and they have not produced the disastrous results predicted by many conservatives, their indiscriminate and impulsive deployments have hurt some of our allies, and caused some economic uncertainty and problems for many Americans. 

I think that SCOTUS is likely to trim Trump’s sails a bit with some forthcoming tariff opinions, and as a strict constructionist, I think that probably should happen.  I think it will be good for the economy, and it might also provide an opportunity to Trump to recalibrate, and hopefully make more congenial trade deals with our allies, while saving the punitive tariffs for our enemies, especially China and Russia.      

But highlights aren’t just instances when we do well.  Highlights also happen when our opponents shoot themselves in the foot, and defecate on their shoes, and step on rakes, and many other metaphors of hilarious self-injury that I cannot think of right now.

And boy, have the Dems been on a self-injury tear this year!  The TDS has settled over the deep blue areas of the country like the plague hitting Europe in the 14th century, and the results are likely to be just about as devastating.  The insane, insurrectionist and violent resistance to ICE enforcing our immigration laws are already starting to bear fruit.  That hag of a judge in Wisconsin who helped an illegal felon temporarily evade ICE has just been convicted, and is providing a good example for the rest of the left-wing partisans in robes.

The flight of American citizens from blue states and cities to red ones is only accelerating, as the horrific results of leftist governance – high taxes, high crime, insufferable micro-managing Karens of both genders – are destroying the quality of life in those blue areas.  Ken Doll Newsom and Brandon Johnson and J(um)B(o) Pritzker continue to afflict the citizens of CA and IL respectively, and Mamdani’s incipient carnival of stupid is about to give NYC voters what they asked for – good, hard and sans lubrication.

As sick as I am of feckless RINO GOPers – thanks for not redistricting, Indiana Republicans! –Congressional Dems have reached new record lows of approval, around 18%!  And they’re still steering into the skid of stupidity.  They’re championing felon illegals, scamming Somalians, and drug-running Venezuelans.  And now they’ve set the Epstein files to blow up in their faces, too.  After four years of having total control over those files and doing nothing with them, they now look like morons as they clamber onto their high horses and accusing Republicans of doing slowly and bumblingly (fact check: true) what they themselves refused to do at all!

And as the newest tranches of Epstein material comes out, it turns out that there is no new damage done to Trump, while Bill Clinton is turning up in a whole photo album of hot tub and pool pics with every female who is not his Clydesdale-ankled harridan of a wife.

Or, as a Babylon Bee headline put it, “A Surprising Amount of Epstein Photos are Turning up in the Bill Clinton Files.” 

Of course the saddest political event of the year was the murder of Charlie Kirk and its aftermath.  It’s fitting that that is the clearest dividing point of 2025, because it became a focus of wildly different reactions that showed the essential nature of so many on both the right and the left.  For the vast majority on the right – and most independents too, I think – the brutal and evil nature of Charlie’s death was rightly repulsive.  So far, at least, it has produced a groundswell of support for Turning Point USA among young people, and a spur for many to turn to (or return to) Christian faith.  

For a tiny sliver of the right, including creepy racist Nick Fuentes and newly creepy anti-Semitic dunce Candace Owens and sadly deteriorating Tucker Carlson, Kirk’s death has provided a jumping-off point for conspiracy theories and mean-spirited attacks on innocent friends and associates of Charlie.

And for the left, his murder unleashed a tidal wave of shockingly ghoulish glee.  They have revealed the ugly reality of their political hatreds in a way that will hopefully inoculate many citizens from wanting to vote for them in the near future, at least.

Coming up next: my hopes – and a few worries – for 2026.

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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An Update, and some Christmas Recommendations (posted 12/23/25)

I wanted to post one more column before Christmas, both to update everyone on the CO Facebook page and to make a few recommendations. 

First, the update.

I spoke with CO last week, and he reminded me that FB suspended the CO site on November 21st, which means that this past Sunday marked one month since that particular day that will live in infamy.  He was hoping that the suspension would be temporary, and if so, that a one-month suspension would be a nice, round number, and that the site might be back up on December 21st or 22nd. 

Since it is now December 23rd and the page is not back up, we all know that that didn’t work.

So we’ve now got two options, which I first mentioned a month ago: either re-create a new Facebook site and hope as many followers from the original site manage to find us there, or create a new site somewhere else. 

Right now, the “somewhere else” option is looking better, if only because the fecklessness of Facebook doesn’t seem fixable.  If we manage to launch another FB site, what’s to say that they won’t shut us down again in another week, or month, or year?  They still have not even responded to CO’s many questions.

Questions like, “Why were we suspended?” and “How long will the suspension last?” and “Specifically how can we avoid getting suspended again in the future?” and “What the hell?”

So CO asked me to do two things:  1. Talk to my whiz kid youngest daughter about alternative options for a new site.  And 2. Ask those of you who followed us here from the CO FB site if you are someone — or know someone — who could assist us in launching a new site. 

What we’re looking for is a kind of quasi-news aggregation site like our original FB page, where CO and a regular cast of characters can link to stories of interest and also put up regular columns, posts, and discussion topics, which all of CO nation can then carry on lively discussions about in the comments.

As opposed to a personal site like my WordPress page that you are now reading – thank you, by the way! – we’re looking to recreate the sense of community that CO inadvertently created on the old FB page, rather than just one person’s site featuring only his own idiosyncratic thoughts, no matter how much of a lovable, hilarious curmudgeon/genius he may be.   (I’m just reporting what I’ve heard, people.)

CO mentioned the Instapundit.com page as one model of what he’s thinking of, and we’re also considering a Substack page, too.  I’ve asked my daughter to look at those models, and she and I will talk about the advantages and disadvantages of those – and any other options she can think of – right after Christmas.    

In the meantime, if any of you have the knowledge to help us set up a site like that, please contact me and let me know that you are willing, and I may reach out to you when we have a plan.  When my brother-in-law saw that the page was suspended, he quickly found and bought the rights to CautiousOptimism.org. So we have a domain name.  (Someone is apparently squatting on the name “CautiousOptimism.com” and wanted $6800 for it!  So that was a hard and quick pass.)

One way or another, our goal is to get a new home for Cautious Optimism up and running in 2026!

Now, on to Christmas. 

I hope you all are either planning to hunker down for a quiet and cozy Christmas at home, or else that your travel plans are made and will come off smoothly.   We’re staying at home for Christmas, and my two brothers-in-law and their wives are coming to us.  Our youngest is home on break after her first semester at Exeter, and our oldest and her husband will be at their home in Denver for the holiday, though they’ll be coming to see us in early January. 

As a Christian, this is always a joyous time of year for me, but it’s always tinged with a little melancholy, as I know it is for others.

My dad died 11 Decembers ago, and that’s always in my mind.  Regular readers know that my mom’s Alzheimer’s has progressed to the point that we had to put her in a memory care home in August.  I was up to see her for an early Christmas last week, and will be up again in a few weeks, and while the disease is robbing her of a little more of herself each week, she still recognizes us, and her default setting of “pretty happy” is still holding.  We’ve been able to focus on the moments with her, and she has been content in the present. 

Which works out, since all she has now is the present, along with a lot of disjointed memories, which are almost all happy ones.  But knowing that last Christmas was the last one she’ll ever spend at home is tougher on us than on her, I think.   

I’ve been listening to a mix of old carols, and some newer versions, too.   You can’t go wrong with brass quartets or quintets doing the former, and a quirky prodigy named Sufjan Stevens has a lot of eccentric but well-done versions that have become favorites – O Come O Come Emmanuel, Lo How a Rose E’er Blooming, Once in Royal David’s City, etc.

I’ll also watch It’s a Wonderful Life, though I’ve seen it so many times that I’ll probably just fast forward to a few specific scenes.  (I can’t get enough Jimmy Stewart, and Donna Reed at the height of her powers approaches the wholesome yet giggity-inducing beauty of my smokeshow wife.) 

And it wouldn’t be Christmas for me with at least one or two versions of A Christmas Carol.  There’ll always be a place in my heart for the two old classics I saw as a kid – the 1938 version with Reginald Owen as Scrooge, and the 1951 with Alistair Sim.  The George C. Scott one is good too, but I grew up with the oldies, and they formed the template for me.  But don’t sleep on the 1999 version, in which Patrick Stewart nailed it. 

And while I know that everyone has seen the movie versions, if you haven’t ever read the Dickens novel, you owe it to yourself.  If you’re going to be traveling and would like the audio version, the late, great Frank Muller did a great reading of it, which you can find anywhere for free. 

Finally, this last month without the CO Facebook page has made me more aware than ever of how much that site has meant to me.  I’ve made friendships there, and found a rare place where good faith debate and civil behavior still actually exists online.  And the chance to write columns has allowed me to mock some idiots, share some thoughts and lower my blood pressure and achieve catharsis on a regular basis.

I can’t thank you all enough for reading and responding, and I am really looking forward to finding a way to launch a new version of Cautious Optimism in the new year!

And I can’t think of a better way to end than with part of the toast that the Charles Dickens character gives at the end of the movie about his writing of A Christmas Carol (called “The Man Who Invented Christmas”):

“I wish you all many, many happy Christmases, and friendships, and great accumulation of cheerful recollections… and heaven at last for all of us!”

Merry Christmas everybody!

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The World can be a Pretty Predictable Place, When it Comes to Mamdani & Aussie Jihadis (posted 12/22/25)

As strange as the news often is, the world usually makes sense to me. 

When a crime is committed, it’s usually by someone you most expect.  If it’s a crime of violence, the perp is usually a young male with a long list of prior arrests.  If an arrest involves a female who is throwing a cringe-inducing fit and making a scene, she’s going to turn out to be someone who hates her dad, would never vote conservative, and whose hair is not the color God made it. 

If you tell me you saw a guy walking down the street with prominent face tattoos, I’ll have two initial questions.  “Was he Jelly Roll?” and “Was he Mike Tyson?”  If the answers are no, that guy is in a gang, or has done time in prison, or has a very low IQ.  Often, it’s all three.

If you tell me that there was a high-profile, violent crime and that the perp reportedly screamed something right before all hell broke loose, I’m going to tell you what he did NOT scream: “Jesus loves me, THIS I KNOW!”  or “That government is best which governs LEAST!”  or “This is MAGA COUNTRY!”

I am too respectful to all groups to say what the person was almost certainly screaming.  But it’s exactly what you are thinking right now.  And it rhymes with, “Ballahu Bakbar!” 

That is just a round-about way of saying that I have not been surprised by the start Mamdani is getting off to in NYC, or by the evil shooting on Bondi beach in Australia last week.

A few weeks ago Mamdani was looking to appoint someone “to advise him on the criminal justice system.”  And he picked… wait for it… a convicted criminal! 

Because of course he did.  After all he really doesn’t like cops, and one of the first goals he articulated was to release as many criminals from New York jails as possible.  In September, he criticized Eric Adams for putting more criminals in jail, and said that he’d like to release enough criminals to get down to 4000, or maybe 3700 people in jail.  He didn’t say anything about releasing innocent people, or those wrongly incarcerated; he just wants more of them out and on the streets.

And if that’s your goal, why not pick a criminal to advise you on crime? 

The convict in question is named Mysonne “Dirty” Linen.  (Okay, I gave him the middle name.  But it was sitting right there, and it would take a more mature man than me to not swing at that slow pitch over the middle.)  And he did 7 years in prison in the early 90s for armed robbery. 

I know what you’re thinking.  Even though it was thirty years ago, and NYC hadn’t descended into the extreme soft-on-crime insanity in which it is now wallowing (and you ain’t seen nothin’ yet!), how many robberies would a criminal have to commit to end up doing 7 years?

The answer, according to the reports I read, is “a string.” 

Perfect! 

But after getting some blowback about that call, Mamdani realized he needed to get his act together, appointment-wise.  So he did an extensive search, and on December 17th he announced with great fanfare his pick of Catherine Almonte Da Costa for Director of Appointments.  Because as he said on that day, this is a “new era,” and Da Costa is “joining us…to bring top talent into this administration.”

Annnnndddd…she’s gone. 

That’s right, the New Era lasted ONE DAY!  Because when he did his extensive vetting, Mamdani missed something that the Anti-Defamation League came up with in 27 seconds, i.e. a bunch of 2011-12 social media posts from Da Costa opining on “rich Jewish peeps,” and “money hungry Jews smh.”  (For those who don’t know social media abbreviations, “smh” doesn’t mean “stupid moronic hater,” but “shaking my head.”)  She also pointed out that “the Far Rockaway Train is the Jew train.”

Gee, who could imagine that a guy who tied himself in knots to avoid rejecting the Jew-hating genocidal credo “globalize the intifada” would pick an anti-Semite to put in charge of picking his appointees?

Buckle up, NYC, because you’re about to get what you voted for – good, and hard, and glazed with incompetence, and served with a side of anti-Semitism and whitey hatred.

Even less surprising than the motley crew of miscreants and boneheads with whom Mamdani is staffing his administration, is the story behind the vicious attack on the unarmed Jews celebrating the first day of Hanukkah on Bondi beach in Australia.

Let’s connect the obvious dots.  First, think through your rolodex of religions – start with Amish and go all the way through to Zoroastrians – and I think I can guess which letter you’re going to stop on.  (I worked my way through college as a mentalist, billed as the “Mysterious Martini.”  You may have seen me with Johnny Carson, when I was telling audience members the name of their first childhood pet, and which card was theirs.)

So I’m going to say…the letter “M.”  And no, I’m not talking Methodist, or Maronite. 

Another detail that makes sense: in a country that prides itself on not letting citizens have guns to protect themselves:

1. One of the few guys in the country who was allowed to have guns – and he had 6 of them, enough for him and his evil son to split the murdering duties! – was a Muslim immigrant whose son had earlier been investigated for ties to ISIS, and who had an ISIS flag in his car when he went out to kill Jews.

(Just for comparison, when my dad and I went out to do some father-and-son stuff, it was to fish, or to have a catch, or to go to a pancake breakfast at our church.  But not the jihadi family.  They bonded over their hatred for the Juden.)   

2. It took forever for someone to show up and stop the killing.  Reports I’ve read say that the shooting went on for at least 10 minutes, and possibly for 15.  Just sit and look at a clock for 15 minutes.  Maybe you could start the timer when the first boat hits Normandy Beach at the beginning of Saving Private Ryan, and try to get a rough count of the number of American soldiers the national socialist soldiers shot during that 10-15 minutes.  That’s an unimaginably long time.

For one more comparison, a year or two ago some jackass went into a Church of Christ in Texas on a Sunday morning and started shooting worshipers.  His kill count was not 15, with more than 40 injured – as was the case in “gun free” Australia – but 2.  That’s a result of the killer in America opening fire in a decidedly NOT gun free zone, where the first return shot was sent his way in…I am not making this up…6 SECONDS!   

Jack Wilson was in church that day, and he was strapped, as they apparently say in Church of Christ circles.  He fired just one warning shot into the murderer’s head, and it was very effective.  The killer fell to the floor and quickly stopped breathing, presumably so that Jack Wilson wouldn’t shoot him anymore.

Another detail: “at least 2” church members drew weapons, but Jack was the first guy on target.  And that was enough. 

Are you listening, Australians?

On the bright side, many people have pointed out that the guy who jumped the second terrorist and took his gun was also a Muslim, and we should appreciate that.  And I agree.  It’s good to remember that many Muslims are good people, even as we can acknowledge that Islam is not compatible with a Western democracy. 

But we also shouldn’t fool ourselves, because no sooner than we start singing the praises of the Muslim hero who jumped the gunman, we are reminded of a larger problem: all those Muslims back in jihadi-land, and how they reacted.

The Daily Mail reported that the story of his heroism was printed in the Ramallah News, which is apparently one of the most popular news outlets in “Palestine.” 

Annnnnddddd…the majority of “Palestinian” Arabs “overwhelmingly condemned him for saving Jewish lives.” 

Unexpectedly!

And before the soft-headed amongst us think that it was just one or two idiots in the comments section, NOPE!  Of the thousand comments on the article, 75% condemned the hero, with lots of wishes that the bullets had killed him, and promises that Allah would “chop [him] to pieces.”  They basically sounded like a bunch of malevolent Democrats after Charlie Kirk was murdered.   (And before, too!)    

In their defense, they were following their religious worldview, which commands them to make war against unbelievers, teaches that Jews are the worst enemies of their faith, and etc.

And you don’t have to be the Mysterious Martini to predict their actions, which are consistent with that worldview.  And it’s a worldview very different from Jack Wilson’s, who said that the killer who came to his church “put me in a position that I would hope no one would have to be in.  But evil exists, and I had to take out an active shooter in church.” 

Yes, you did.  And well done.

As for the Aussies, I think they might be too far gone.  After watching their police cower and do nothing for a very long time while jihadi murderers shot into a crowd of helpless, unarmed people, their prime minister immediately vowed to…toughen their gun laws even more, to ensure that the next time some law breaker attacks, the law-abiding citizens will remain defenseless. 

I’d suggest he look at the areas in America where the gun laws are the strictest – like Chicago, and DC, and Baltimore – and look at the death toll in those open-air firing ranges, except that he’s obviously allergic to facts and logic.   

How bad is it?  Cassie the Wonder Dog – my great Aussie shepherd – has asked me to file paperwork to renounce her breed.  From now on, she is going to identify as an American shepherd.

Hamas (and Trantifa) delenda est!

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