Another Red Flag, Pride Flag Goofiness, & AOC Stays True to Form (posted 2/17/23)

+The ridiculous stories just keep coming, so I’m going to jump right in.

So now we’re apparently shooting down random flying things like they’re Heinkel bombers at the height of the Battle of Britain.  I don’t have anything substantive to add to all of the Balloongate 23! craziness, other than a language note that caught my eye.

In an effort to reassure us that the many objects now apparently darkening our skies are not aliens or Chicom aggressors, several pols and commentators have called them “sky trash.”  Which sounds just great.

It’s also a blast from the past, because back when Bill Clinton was flying on Air Force One or Marine One, his secret service code name was “Sky Trash.” 

And before you can ask:  Hillary was “Sea Biscuit.”  Monica was “Humidor.”  And Chelsea was “Poor Thing.”

True story.

Today’s Red Flag story comes to us from the National Archives and the Smithsonian in DC, and involves events that happened during the week of the National March for Life, on January 20^th.

Taxpayer-funded employees at those two places were offended by many visitors’ clothing which featured pro-life slogans or statements, and systematically insisted that they either remove them or leave the premises.  Visitors from at least three states were told that slogans such as, “I am the Post-Roe Generation,” “Law Students for Life,” and “Life is a HUMAN RIGHT,” constituted, “disturbing the peace,” because they would, “incite others” and “cause a disturbance.” 

Staff members at the Smithsonian National Air and Space Museum demanded that Catholic students wearing pro-life hats “either take them off or leave!”  One open-minded progressive yelled at one student, “We are a museum that promotes equality, and your hats do not promote equality!”

Were people wearing gear with slogans like, “My Body, My Choice,” and “Pro-Choice!” similarly confronted, you don’t have to ask, because you already absolutely know the answer?

And these weren’t just the random actions of one or two people.  Many different security guards and museum employees did this at several times throughout the day to many different visitors at two different locations.

When the conservative law group American Center for Law and Justice (ACLJ) sued, the responsible organizations both retreated, giving the least believable story since Liz Warren explained that Geronimo and Crazy Horse were both her great-grandfathers. (#wemustneverstopmockingher)

They said that policing visitors’ clothing “is not in keeping with our policy,” and that they “welcome all visitors without regard to their beliefs.”  They also said that their employees were given immediate re-training.

I can only hope that the re-training involved Three-Stooges-style face-slapping.  And perhaps some light caning.

By the way, the ACLU didn’t say a word about this, because they pay as much attention to the civil rights of non-left-wingers as Karine Jean-Pierre does to male suitors.

What makes this red flag more of a scarlet flag is that many of those whose speech-bearing clothing was censored had traveled to the National Archives specifically to see… wait for it… the Bill of Rights!  Which begins with a little scribbling about our God-given right to free speech.           

Because the Left does not understand irony.

You may remember that in my last column I commented on the racial divisiveness inherent in playing the “black national anthem” at the Super Bowl.  I made the point that if one group gets a separate national anthem, everyone’s going to want one, and we’ll look like insensitive racists if we don’t give in.

Pretty soon French-Americans will insist on taking their berets off to Cheap Trick’s “Surrender,” and Icelandic-Americans will demand some hideous Bjork song, and Mexican-Americans will be belting out “Ay, Macarena!” 

(Okay, so I don’t know many Mexican songs.  And yes, the guys who sang Macarena weren’t even Mexican.  But “La Cucaracha” seems even more disrespectful.  That leaves me “The Frito Bandito” song, which I still remember from grade school, and still find hilarious.  But as they say on the cartoon Archer… “inaprops.”) 

Well, an analogous incident has happened in CA that has proven me right.  And not just because the north star of stupid – Adam Schiff – has taken the opposite side.

Instead of additional national anthems, this story involved additional flags on government buildings. 

Two years ago, the Huntington Beach city council voted to allow a LGBTQ+ group to fly the Pride flag, in addition to the usual state and federal flags, on municipal buildings.  Since a more conservative council has been elected recently, the council just voted to disallow any specific sub-group flags.

Cue Schiff-for-brains, who tweeted that not flying the Pride flag is an “attempt to marginalize LGBTQ+ individuals.  But hate cannot be allowed to win.”

Thankfully, Schiff’s moronic take got blasted in the responses, with many people asking whether we should also have straight pride flags.  And I foresee the same kind of explosion of new flags as I predicted with the multiplying ethnic anthems. 

There are already many variations on the pride flag for various sexual sub-groups (bisexuals, pansexuals, etc.), so why not the same thing on the hetero side?  Traditionalists might favor the missionary position, so do they get a flag?  How about the doggy style enthusiasts?  I know some people who are very fond of the ol’ reverse cowgirl.

I mean, not me.  Just people I know.  Not personally, but just from… you know… research.

Perhaps I’ve said too much.

Anyway, that road leads to madness, with half of next year’s city budget going to the purchase of flagpoles and flags.  And then you’ve got to cover your kids’ eyes when you’re trying to make your way past dozens of obscene flags just to get into the courthouse to pay a parking ticket. 

Enough!  One national anthem, one state flag, and the stars and stripes.  Other than that, leave us alone, you freaks!

In the “Americans stricken with Idiocy” column, reliable young lunkhead AOC had a rough fortnight.  

First she made a fool of herself, ranting when fellow squad member and jihadi-adjacent brother-marrier Ilhan Omar got tossed off the foreign affairs committee.  She bounced around and pounded the podium, and threw out all the tired cliches: this is about Omar’s race, and about her sex, and about her being a Muslim.

She didn’t mention the reasons that McCarthy had listed – Omar’s long and consistent pattern of anti-Semitic hatred – because she didn’t have a reasonable answer for those.  She also didn’t mention that the GOP is doing exactly what the Dems did to them last term, by setting a precedent of kicking the opposing party’s most abrasive members off of committees. 

Now that the GOP has the House majority, what’s good for the goose is good for the slanderers!

When I was doing some writing workshops for law students, a law professor told me a courtroom strategy that encapsulates AOC’s tantrum perfectly: “When the law is on your side, pound the law.  When the facts are on your side, pound the facts.  When the law and the facts are both against you, pound the table.”  

Then, while football fans were enjoying the Super Bowl and non-fans were critiquing the commercials, AOC donned her dunce cap again, and found the most ridiculous thing to get offended by during a 7-hour broadcast: the two short “Jesus Gets Us” ads.

If you didn’t see them, one is tagged, “Love your Enemies,” and depicts a bunch of pictures of people yelling at each other.  The closing tag line is, “Jesus loved the people we hate.  He gets us.  All of us.” 

The second one is tagged, “Be childlike,” and shows pictures of children being kind to each other, including several featuring cross-racial childhood friendships.  The closing tag line is, “Jesus didn’t want us to act like adults.” 

I know that religion is a touchy subject, to say the least.  And it would be easy to make a religious ad that would offend most Democrats. 

(For example, I could see one with Jesus saying, “I said suffer the children to come unto Me.  But good lord, I didn’t mean abort them! What’s wrong with you?!”   Or maybe one that just shows a montage of Biden fumbling around and looking like he’s ready to lie in state in the Capitol rotunda, and then fade the screen to black, and put up these words:  “’And as it is appointed unto men once to die; but after this the judgment.’  Joe Biden completed step 1 several years ago….”)

But these two ads were not that.  They were completely anodyne.  You’d have to be a pretty unhinged Christophobe to get upset over them.

Cut to AOC, plopping her juicy booty (her words, not mine) onto her computer chair and tweeting out some dumbness:  “Something tells me Jesus would *not* spend millions of dollars on Super Bowl ads to make fascism look benign.”

Fascism! 

Remember all those speeches in which Hitler and Mussolini went on and on about, “Love your enemies!  Treat them kindly!  Be nice to each other, like children!”

Me neither.

There is only one clear, rational conclusion to explain AOC’s tweet:

She thinks that Jesus wants to date her.   

On a final note, two years ago today we lost Rush Limbaugh, and that one still hurts.  But this weekend, two of the VIPs in the CO Nation who are still fighting the good fight – CO himself, and the Correspondent for Thinly Researched Conspiracy Theories, Manufactured Intrigue, and Ill-Advised Speculation – are celebrating their 60^th birthdays. 

I’m so bummed that I’m not able to make it to World Headquarters for the big event, but I will be there in spirit.  And all I ask is that somebody at the party makes a cruel joke about Liz Warren being whiter than Aspen in January.

Because whenever two or more COers are gathered, and they all chant, “#wemustneverstopmockingher” together, there I’ll be, in the midst of them.

Happy birthday, boys!

Fetterman/the musical genius who wrote “Macarena,” 2024!